Stepping into your Power, Not Proving it…
My 20s: “I hope they like me.”
My 30s: “I’m an acquired taste, relax…it took me 32 years to like myself this much”
Shifting gears and perspective can take time, and that is totally ok.
And honestly? It didn’t happen overnight. People always said “your 30s will change you,” and I used to think… okay, sure. Meanwhile my ego was doing CrossFit. If someone knew more than me, I was ready for intellectual battle…zero to defensive in 0.2 seconds.
I also hated being told what to do…
To be fair… I still don’t love it (ask my husband). But the difference now? Back then it was insecurity. Now it’s just choosing to say no and liking it.
I used to get frustrated because I didn’t want to look incompetent. Plot twist: that’s exactly how you stay incompetent. Turns out, learning from people is how you actually get good at things. Shocking.
The upgrade is this: you don’t need to absorb everything people say (because let’s be honest, some of it is total garbage). But you can take what resonates, skills, perspectives, even just what feels right, and leave the rest.
Because real power isn’t about proving you’re the best.
It’s about how you absorb, adapt, and move.
Case in point: I recently made a career move that my logical brain is still side-eyeing.
After 8 years of working toward a specific goal, I reached it and was given a sweet contract that I loved… and then the contract ended. Cool, cool, cool. My options were:
Go backwards
Take a $12K pay cut and start at the bottom in a new department
Leave entirely
Naturally, I chose option two. Humbling. Character-building. Financially offensive.
The first couple months? I was mad. Questioning everything, loyalty, leadership, my life choices. Like excuse me??? After 8 years??
And then… it clicked.
Maybe my value at work isn’t going to meet my expectations. So instead of fighting that, I adjusted something else…my priorities.
I stopped treating work like the ultimate scoreboard and started treating it like what it actually is: a tool to support the life I want.
And when I zoomed out? I realized something kind of wild.
I’m already valued.
At home.
By my husband.
By my kids.
I’m already a leader. I already have loyalty. I already have purpose.
I was out here trying to squeeze fulfillment out of a job… when I already had it, sitting at my dinner table.
That doesn’t mean I don’t care about my work, it just means it doesn’t define me anymore. So now, I move differently.
I put my energy into what actually gives me life. And when something starts draining me? That’s my cue, it’s time to switch it up.
Because stepping into your power isn’t always about pushing harder. Sometimes it’s realizing you’ve been chasing something you already have.
Gone are the days of pouring from an empty cup.
If you want me, earn me, because I am fucking awesome.
